Monday, December 15, 2014

Trial and Error

Well, I know it's been a big break since I last published. The past few weeks have been quite trying with our newest edition! She's quite a bit more temperamental than M ever was as a baby.

 For the past few weeks we've been struggling with naps and a sleep pattern. L didn't really have one. She still doesn't really, I'm pretty lucky if I can get her to take one good nap in a day let alone two or maybe 3 short ones. She still isn't really sleeping through the night without a fussy wake in the middle of the night... there was a few weeks there when I was just in tears on a daily basis about what to do! I tried the chiropractor, a counselor and finally the doctor just said, she'll figure it out! So I kind of just sighed and said... ok, just let her figure it out. 

There are still days I feel like crying because when she doesn't want to nap, she'll scream at the top of her little lungs but I just have to try and keep her on a little bit of a schedule. She seems to be adapting some days and others she rebels, but I guess that's to be expected. 

What made it doubly difficult was the days I had M I felt like I was neglecting her and focusing solely on L. She's gotten pretty good at helping and knowing when I need extra help if L is being difficult. I have to look at the silver lining each chance I get. She's sleeping in her own crib, she naps sometimes and most of all, she's a pretty happy baby. It's those little things I have to keep reminding myself of and take each day, each moment really, as it comes. 

Hopefully the next 2 months won't be nearly as stressful however she'll likely start getting teeth and throw a wrench in it to keep me on my toes! :)

Coming up on Saturday is M's 3rd birthday party! I can't believe she's going to be 3! It should be fun!

Tuesday, October 28, 2014

Words and actions

When I was working full time I would send a "thought of the day" to my family by email. The TOTD's, as I came to call them, were meant to give them a smile, or a laugh, or maybe some encouragement for the day. I usually pulled a quote from few "quotations" websites that I liked. Those quotes were often from historical figures, sometimes from books and more recent entries were from celebrities.

I started saving quotes that I really liked hoping to pass on the wisdom of the words to my children in times where they might be relevant. That may sound like me being a little unimaginative as a parent using someone else's words but sometimes the right words fail me and it's nice to get a little help from others whose experience may offer valid insight. It might also provide them with a different perspective than my own words might. Unfortunately, I saved them on my computer at work and didn't transfer them before I left.

There is, however, one that has always stuck in my head and I like to think of it as a goal for everyday.

Be the change you want to see in the world. - Mahatma Gandhi

This is definitely the way of thinking I'd like to pass on to my children. As a parent we have to start small. Be the person you want your children to be. Our children watch everything we do... EVERYTHING. I was reminded of this the other day when I was talking on the phone to my mom and Little M decided to keep interrupting me. I was a little short tempered because I hadn't had the best night's sleep as Little L wanted to wake up every 2 hours that night. So I kind of barked at her when I said to be quiet I was on the phone. Well, later that day, she was playing pretend with her phone and I went to ask her something and she gave me the exact look I can imagine was on my face and told me "Be quiet! I'm on the phone!" Well, that sure made me think! We are the examples for how our children will see the world and if we want them to be kind and compassionate to others we have to set the precedent for them. Like I said, we have to start small, like modeling patience. But we also have to not be too hard on ourselves because some days will be better than others. 

Wednesday, October 22, 2014

Enjoying Fall

Has it really been 11 weeks since my second little one was born? On the one hand it feels like she's been a regular part of our routine for longer than that. On the other, it feels like I'm starting to get a semblance of a routine. Although she doesn't yet sleep for long periods at night on a regular basis, for the most part, she's starting to take regular naps and is less fussy than she was previously (although daddy might argue that not to be the case since she cries most often with him).

Big sister seems to be adjusting well. She loves kissing, caressing and getting in her little sister's face to little sis's frustration, but I'm sure soon enough she'll have her chance to return the favor. On the days she's not in daycare I like to work with her on the letter of the week and also watch her ride her balance bike. She's really starting to get confident on it and I can't wait until she's gliding all over the place! :)

So I had printed out a "Fall Bucket List" of things to do during the fall. So far we'v done pretty good. We've admired the changing colors, had apple cider, ate pumpkin bread, visited a pumpkin patch and we give thanks daily. Not bad for the first month and a half of Fall with a new little one in tow!


I'm so blessed that I have this opportunity to be with my girls. I don't know if it will be forever but I aim to get everything out of it and give everything I can to them. The time passes much too quickly.

So now I would like to start getting myself organized and looking a bit ahead to having something to do on the side. Something for myself to keep my brain engaged. I enjoy my signing class but haven't been able to return since little one will not yet take a bottle and is usually pretty fussy at night anyway. As Marc has always told me, I'm a life long learner and I would love to take some classes to refresh my anthropology knowledge but probably not at this juncture since I have zero time to read much! :) But hopefully in the near future. We'll see, just another adventure to look forward to. I'll keep you posted!

Thursday, September 25, 2014

Throw back Thursday

Do you remember that commercial from the eighties? The one that shows a frying pan and the VoiceOver begins 

'This is your brain' 

There's a brief pause as an egg is tossed into the pan. The sizzle of the heat is heard as the egg begins to fry. The VoiceOver continues 

'This is your brain on drugs' 

and there is an extended pause for dramatic effect... 

'Any questions?' 

I must admit as a young child not yet wise in the ways of the world, that commercial did make an impression on me, though I wasn't entirely sure I understood the meaning.

But now, as a parent I totally understand. I'd like to take that very effective visual and modify it a bit to put my own spin on it.

There's still the frying pan and it begins the same

'This is your brain' the egg gets dropped in as before but instead of the egg sitting there with the sizzling heat depicting the frying of a brain on drugs...  A whisk appears and begins to violently scramble the white and yoke making no attempt to combine the two only to splatter them about into a gooey mess of confusion and disorder.

The voiceover continues...

'This is your brain on parenting' and as the gloppy mess begins to burn the cracked shell is tossed into the pan for good measure...

'Any questions?' Well are there? Because honestly I probably forgot if you asked me already...

This message has been brought to you by 'mommy moments' for your laughing pleasure.

Saturday, September 13, 2014

Adventures in being home

I'm two weeks into this Stay at home mommy thing and this was the first week with M's new daycare schedule of going only two days per week. I think it has gone pretty well. Monday, like usual, was a Nama day so we all decided to go to The Butterfly Pavilion. I'd never gone and we thought M would enjoy it. It was a perfect day. Nama and I switched off from little L and little M who loved chasing the butterflies and made little excited squeals when they got close to her. The souvenir M wanted? A necklace with an octopus, not the cute little butterfly necklace mommy picked out... :-)

Tuesday was our first day as mommy and girls and I'd say it went pretty good with only a couple tantrums from M. I was able to keep her entertained and she even took a good nap! 

Wednesday and Thursday were her daycare days and mommy's days to do grocery shopping and have my chiropractic appointment and squeeze lunch in with Nama. I was also a able to have an appointment to get an estimate for getting our siding redone. 

Friday was our second day with M at home and Nama had Little E so we all decided to go to the Museum. That was a pretty busy morning and it's harder to be able to participate in the activities with M while pushing a sleeping baby in a stroller. But E and M had fun. 

I'd say the week was successful in all. There were moments of toddler drama and tantrums while trying to get the baby to stop crying while trying to make dinner and having it be an hour later than usual... And there are time when I think to myself that I have to work on making myself productive... But some moments you have to just let it go! Like yesterday afternoon, we just veged on the couch watching Finding Nemo and then had mac and cheese for dinner... A good end to a good week. On to the next!

Wednesday, September 3, 2014

Just Call Me SAHM

It's official! As of yesterday my new title is Stay At Home Mom! Friday I submitted my resignation letter to the firm and yesterday I dropped off my keys and parking pass and picked up my belongings. I feel excited, scared and happy. I'm so blessed to be able to have the opportunity to stay home with our girls and it's all thanks to my loving husband. He took a leap with his new career path at the beginning of this year and now he's giving me the chance to do the same. 

I remember how difficult it was leaving our little two month old M at all day daycare when we had to do so. I'm glad I won't have to do that with little L at least not at 2 months old. Yes, we're going to have to scale back on things but I think we'll be able to make it work and for the better. I hope to be able to work part time in the future and to be doing something that I enjoy and believe in. But for right now I want to take the time to enjoy this. We all know how fast time goes by, especially with kids! I can't believe my big girl is going to be 3 soon! I just have to be the best little SAHM I can be. Thank you for this blessing!

Saturday, August 23, 2014

Monkey moments

Sitting on the couch in the early morning quiet while nursing L, my eyes fluttering open and closed from sleep deprivation, I glance down at my nursing babe and smile. This is one of the good parts of enduring the lack of sleep and finally getting past the nursing soreness. Her soft nuzzling for milk with her little bright eyes shining in the glow of the early morning light. When I lay her on my chest to burp her, she curls up into her fetal position and falls asleep. I love when she lays like that.  Marc says she looks like a little monkey hanging on me :-). I remember when M did and I just wanted her to stay on my chest forever.  It happens so quick. Now she's such a big girl! But her hugs mean so much now too because you can tell she really means them. L will grow quickly too so I want to make a written memory of it. Who knows when I'll have another 'monkey' on my chest. 

Wednesday, August 20, 2014

Mama of two (week 2)

Well I must admit I was a little nervous about being a mom of two. I wanted so much for M to have a sibling, someone that she could teach new things and also that she could play with. But I was worried having two would make me feel divided. I'm only two weeks into this mom of two gig but so far... so good (knock on wood). Right now we've kind of developed a schedule for taking big sister to daycare in the morning between nursing the little one, feeding the big one, dressing the big one between diaper changes, and still getting a little morning play in for the big one. In the afternoon, when we pick up big sister from daycare, we usually have to get home, nurse the little one while big sister draws/colors/plays, and then start dinner. We haven't gotten that down yet as our time is a little off. Daddy's getting home and either helping with dinner or playing with big sister. Either way, it's a team effort :)

Big sister is a good helper. She likes to help get a diaper or wipes or something else I might need while I'm nursing her sister. One thing I have noticed is her ability to continually repeat something she might need or want if daddy and I are involved in a conversation not exactly focusing on her. She'll repeat and repeat and then get louder. That's ok, she's adjusting too.

I still haven't developed much of a schedule for the rest of the time little L and I are home together by ourselves. I've been doing a few little things here and there. The dishes are staying clean, which is nice, and laundry is getting done, but other things aren't a priority as yet. I'm still getting into a groove. I'm not sure if I'd be as put together if big sister was home with us all day. I might have to see how that goes eventually. I hope I can keep it on track!

Friday, August 15, 2014

Our Second Baby Girl Arrives

Well, it's been just over a week and I'm finally taking a moment to update the blog that our littlest girl arrived into the world last Wednesday, August 6. I'll apologize up front for the length of this post but I haven't had a chance to tell our story for posterity so this will be my record of it.

My water broke around 7:30 on Tuesday evening. Although I only had the tiniest of thoughts that it might be my water bag as it wasn't like you see in the movies, a big gush of water. It was entirely subtle so I thought only a little of it at that moment. You see, with M, I had to be induced. I didn't get to feel what it felt like for my water bag to break by itself and my contractions were chemically induced through pitocin. This time I was hoping and praying I'd get to experience what it was like to actually go into labor. As my due date was approaching I was beginning to think that maybe my body didn't really know what to do when it came to that point. Happily, I was wrong about that. As I put the big girl down for bed I snuggled her and I asked her "are you ready for L to come out of mama's tummy so you can meet her" and she just had the biggest smile on her face when she said "yes" that it gave me goosebumps. I think I was just savoring what were to be my last moments with my big girl as an only child. With a big kiss and a hug she laid down and went to sleep.

As I joined Marc downstairs we each had a popsicle and watched our recorded show "Face/Off" on ScyFy. During the show I kept thinking to myself if it had been my water breaking it would have been more noticeable. After our show was done we kind of watched a little more TV and chatted about the usual stuff. We were in a chatty mood that night. Maybe we knew we wouldn't have time to catch up on the little stuff for a while after that night due to exhaustion, or maybe not.

As we prepared for bed I was beginning to have a cramps feeling on my right side. Around 10 p.m. as we were getting ready to lie down for the evening I felt it again. I thought it might be prudent to mention it to Marc, just in case. I told him about the possibility of my water breaking even though it didn't feel like much water and that I just noticed a couple of crampy feelings about 25 minutes apart. I told him "we might have a baby soon". He was lying in bed and he fluffed his pillow and said with a smile, "Guess we'll see! Better try to get some rest then". So I tried to fall asleep but at the same time I was googling on my phone "water break and not know it" and other similar phrases. Turns out, it doesn't always come in a rush and sometimes isn't noticeable. Marc kept telling me to go to sleep because I'd need my rest.

At around 11:30 I decided to call the midwife to see if my water broke what she suggested. She said it could have been my water and to come into the office at 8 if nothing progressed and they would check to see if it was my water.

I laid down again but decided to try to sleep upstairs as I kept waking Marc up. By this point, I was beginning to be more sure that the cramps feelings were contractions as they started to become more uniform and were now approximately 20 minutes apart. As I lay in bed trying to rest, my mind rushed with the idea that our little girl might be here soon. It was around 2 a.m. when my contractions started to become 10 minutes apart. At that point I texted my mom to make her aware that she may have to come over to watch the big girl if we needed to get to the hospital. Sure enough, my contractions continued at 10 minutes apart. Mom made it to our house by 3:20 and we were out the door by 3:30. I so wanted to wake M and give her a big hug to let her know but of course I didn't. Mom gave me a big hug and we both knew that the baby was going to come pretty soon and it was going to be just Marc and me at the hospital.

We arrived at the hospital just before 4 a.m. and from their my contractions just got stronger. With both M and L I wanted to experience natural birth. I got a lot of flack from coworkers and other people saying things like "you don't get a medal for it". I wasn't trying to earn a medal, I just wanted to be as strong as the women who've come before me, including my mom. I received nothing but support from Marc and the rest of my family on it both times. Unfortunately, I didn't get to experience that with M due to the pitocin but I honestly wanted to experience it with this little one. But as I sat there and the nurse was asking me questions to get me checked in and my contractions got stronger I felt like giving in and asking for the epidural. I felt like I was letting myself and my daughter down. I can't say enough about my husband. He was there for me whatever decision I made and he made me feel strong no matter what. But, by the time I decided to get the epidural, it was too late. I guess fate works in our best interests sometimes whether we decide one way or another.

It was time to push. The contractions felt like they were trying to squeeze my little one out so I knew it was time to try helping. The midwife was there with the one nurse and Marc. Marc was ready, he'd been holding my hand and holding my body up throughout the contractions. I could tell he was nervous but also excited. As Marc and the Jennifer (our nurse) each held one of my legs back I started to push. I must admit, I wasn't the most efficient pusher at the beginning and I could tell I was pushing incorrectly but those contractions were SO powerful. But throughout I remember Marc kept saying "you got this" and "you're doing great". My midwife, calm as can be was just watching for our little one's head, it hadn't made an appearance yet.

Suddenly my contractions were so strong I remember saying "it hurts! it hurts!" and my midwife Jane said "that's when you push" so I pushed long and hard I would take a breath and push again and again. I remember Marc saying "I see her, L's almost here" and that's when I really gave it all I had left. I remember the pain but just seeing in my minds eye what little L's view was, coming through as I pushed and I felt her head, then her shoulders and then she was out! I heard her cry and saw Marc smiling and he looked at her and looked at me and then L was on my chest, skin to skin crying with her beautiful little eyes open and facing her daddy. She had a mass of dark hair. I was out of breath but I cried and kissed her beautiful head. And I thought of our little M with her beautiful blonde hair, at home asleep and that she was now a big sister.

L was born. She's my wee one.

It was both extremely difficult and indescribably beautiful to be able to bring L into this world without the pain medication. I know that I am capable of such things, I had doubted myself when I originally asked for it but I was able to do it. But I also realize that it is not weakness to have to get it either. I'm happy that I've been able to experience both with my girls.

My girls... I'm still getting used to saying that, but I smile every time I do.

Monday, August 4, 2014

Circling

Well, it's almost that time. Here we are 6 days from my due date with baby girl number 2. I'm so excited, but also anxious. Not about labor or delivery but about our new and different family dynamic that baby #2 will bring to our house. M is growing so fast it seems. She's a little person with her very own sense of humor, opinions and of adventure... She loves to talk to anyone who will listen whether it's telling a waiter in restaurant that she got new sandals (or the table across from us for that matter) or just waiving "hi" to everyone we pass in the store. She makes me smile with pride and joy every day! But she is also still a 2 1/2 year old in that she doesn't listen all the time, likes to be mischievous, doesn't want to go to bed sometimes and wants only mama a lot of the time. That's the part that will be the hardest with the new little one. But she's also a very adaptable little girl. She's doing great at her new daycare and has been moved up this month to Preschool 1! Preschool 1!!! Already!

I asked her the other night if she's ready for her sister to be out of mommy's tummy so she can meet her and she gave me the biggest smile like she was so excited. I know she may not really understand the impact it will have on her young life but I see she's genuinely excited to meet her new sister. We all are! So here I am, circling my due date, waiting for the newest little one to make her appearance. The newest adventure in our lives.

Tuesday, May 27, 2014

Daddy/Daughter

Yesterday we enjoyed a wonderful family day where we drove out to see the animals at the Wild Animal Sanctuary to see the lions and tigers and bears (Oh my!)... and wolves :) They are a sanctuary for large exotic and endangered carnivores that were born into captivity. It is a very nice place for these animals to have a second chance at a happy life with room to roam. M loved seeing the animals but wanted them to "raar" as she says. She also wanted to pet them, which is something we had to explain to her the difference between teddy bears and real bears! Something we'll have to reinforce as we take her camping more often. So Marc and I took turns either pushing her in the stroller or holding her or walking with her. My favorite part was watching her with her daddy. He would point at an animal and ask her what color or what animal  it was and what noise it made and just engage her. He even had her howl to the wolfpack that were howling :) It was awesome to watch the quality interaction between them. We stopped at a restaurant for a late lunch before leaving Hudson. The service was incredibly slow and we ended up leaving later than we wanted to, past M's nap time, but the whole time we were there, M giggled and climbed on her daddy. That night, putting our little one to bed, daddy was tickling her (doing all the things to rile her up before bed...) and they were both laughing facing each other. Their profiles struck me, how much their smiles are the same, how their laughs make their eyes sparkle the same and they're light hair highlights their skin. It made me smile. I hope they forever have a daddy/daughter bond that grows as she grows. The same I hope for our second little one. Mommy/daughter bonds almost come naturally and I've been enjoying our time as just the two of us before our world is changed by daughter number 2. I also hope M and her sister will have their own close sisterly bond. I should know, that is one of the best things to have is a best friend to grow up with :)

Sunday, May 18, 2014

Toddler-isms

There are some things that are so adorable you wish they'd never grow out of. I've heard some people refer to them as toddler-isms. For M, she has some really cute things she says. "Oatmilk" instead of oatmeal. "What's that making loud?" when something is loud (obviously :) "Roni cheese" for macaroni and cheese. Something that she just started saying when I tell her it's time for a nap or to eat her dinner "I just already..." For example "I just already wake up from nap" when what she means is she woke up from sleeping in the morning. Or "I just already take a bite".

Another cute one, for those of you who know her, M talks very clear for her age. The only thing I've noticed that she doesn't do clearly are her words with "st". For example she says "resaraunt" instead of restaurant. Or "Sop" for Stop. And one we really have to watch out for is "suck" for stuck. That one through me the first time she said it :)

M is also very specific when she talks as well. How this enter's into conversation as an example, she likes to remove whatever footwear she's wearing when she's in her carseat on our way to somewhere. I'll tell her "leave your shoes on!" and if she happens to be wearing sandals she'll say "No mama, these are sandals". Or we were riding in daddy's truck one day and she wanted to listen to the Spanish CD I play for her in my car. I told her "we don't have that music in this car" and she said "no mama, this is a truck". I really have no idea where she got that trait from :)

Saturday, May 17, 2014

Me time, you time... baby time

I realize that M's time as an only child is quickly coming to a close. It's not a bad thing but it will be a new and different thing, for both her and I that we'll both have to get used to. Her, as a toddler who's been at the center of our household for the past 2 1/2 years! We have our little routine of story time and snuggling at bedtime and for her morning wake up I come in an nuzzle her and she tries to cover her head with her blanket :) It's intimate one on one time that will soon be divided. I know I've only been at this parenting thing for 2 1/2 years, but I can say without hesitation that sharing your time is tough! I look forward to meeting our new little miss and I can't wait until they can play and giggle together and when M starts teaching her things that she knows. I'm just hoping that my little helper still wants to be helpful when she sees the baby will be sharing the time she used to get by herself. As I said before, it will be a transition but I just hope it will be more snuggles and daddy playtime than grudge matches! Either way, I have faith that once she gets into the swing of things with our new family member, she will be the BEST big sister she can be. I can't wait to share snuggle time with both my little sweeties. Time passes too quickly... we just have to breathe in every moment, even the frustrating ones and soak in the special moments no matter how they come to us.

Wednesday, April 9, 2014

The Chair



When I was pregnant with M I found a rocker/glider chair off of craigslist. It was of course one of the "good" brands, because as you know, a new mommy want the best. The previous owners had reupholstered it themselves. Well it may have been reupholstered but the cushioning on the inside was the old stuff. So my mom had it redone. The only thing was I labeled the seat and the back wrong and so the back ended up becoming the seat and not fitting correctly. Well it’s been that way since and it hasn’t really bothered me. It’s been the chair that I’ve nursed M in since the beginning. It first sat downstairs in the basement so I could get up for middle of the night feedings. Then it was put in her room when she moved up to her crib. We would sometimes hide out in her room to nurse if company was at the house and I loved when she got older and started being silly with mama when she nursed. She would lay there in my arms after nursing and gurgle words and then as she got older she would say “all done” when she was done nursing. It was also where she would look at mommy’s parts with curiosity and poke at them and giggle.

It has now been two months since I last nursed M. It was almost an abrupt stop. I had just weaned her from nursing in the morning the week before and was planning maybe another month of slowly weaning from before bedtime nursing. Well that weekend I decided to finally convert her crib into the day bed so she could learn how to sleep in a regular bed. On Sunday afternoon I got the front crib panel off and I fixed her bed all cozy for her and told her it was now her “big girl bed” she was so excited and wanted to jump in it and lay down right away. She was so excited that she didn’t even remember to ask for milk before bed. She went to sleep without fuss and woke up the next morning ready to go to Nama’s house. So off to Nama’s house for the day. I was still surprised she hadn’t mentioned “milk”, even in the morning. The week before she would ask for it in the morning and I would say “Remember, we’re not having mama’s milk in the morning, we’re having breakfast”. It wasn’t even until that evening and she kind of remembered but forgot again right before bed. When she finally realized what had happened I told her “You’re a big girl now! Mama’s milk made you strong and healthy and now you don’t need it anymore” She was kind of okay with that explanation but we had to change up our bedtime routine a little so she wouldn’t feel like she needed mama’s milk. We started reading more books before bed and even a little TV some nights after dinner to watch “Harry Potta” with daddy. We also kind of stayed away from the nursing chair and it became more of a place to pile things some days but we’ve been reading her bedtime stories sitting on the floor by her bed. So now, here we are, two months later. Yesterday morning when she woke up I was cuddling her in the dark and had sat down in the chair… she kind of mumbled something and I said “what did you say love?” and she said “I want milk” really shy and quietly. We hadn’t snuggled in that chair really in the last two month. I smiled, hugged her tight and I told her “you’re a big girl love and you don’t need mama’s milk anymore. But we can cuddle anytime you want!” She hugged me and said “I want eggy’s”. So off to the kitchen for scrambled eggs.

She had a good transition I think. She didn’t have any tantrums or withdraw into baby type behavior like some toddlers I’d read do. She’s grown SO much in the last two months too! Or maybe I just notice it more because we’re not nursing now. Her potty training is going great! She wears a pull up at night but it’s been dry every time I take it off. At school she usually might just have one or two accidents a week, if that. None at home to speak of barring an incident in daddy’s car J. Her vocabulary and her memory are just amazing, I’m thinking she got her daddy’s memory (Thank Goodness!). The other night I sat down to finally start her 2nd year photo album and just looking at the pictures from this time last year it’s incredible how much she’s changed and grown! It made me a little sad but also incredibly happy how we have this beautiful, happy healthy little girl that we’re so blessed to see grow and change each day. 

Now I just have to convince her to let me take the chair out of her room to use for baby sister :)

Wednesday, February 12, 2014

Confessions of a bad blogger

Ok, the main reason I'm a bad blogger should be obvious... I don't blog that often. Well that's not entirely my fault... I mean I have a 40 hour a week job, a 2 year old busy toddler, housework, dinner, swim class, etc, etc, etc. Yes, I'm aware that I've basically described everyone else who wants to do something but has several other things on the burner too... In other words... Life. So yes, I let the usual things get in the way of me sitting down and taking a moment to describe my life adventures for all of my 8 readers. (Although I'm not sure all of you are still with me so I may be talking to myself here) which is ok too. I find it a cathartic exercise when I actually get the chance to blog, that is when I have a topic in mind. If I'm just trying to post something it's more of a chore :-).

Besides letting the every day particulars get in my way of writing a blog, I'm also known to be a tiny bit lazy sometimes and plop myself on the couch to watch the tube after work (that is after dinner, bath and bedtime for the wee one). My excuse for this being that my brain hurts from looking at the computer all day at work and I don't want to get on at home. Lame excuse I know because the TV is, after all, another screen. In my own defense, we're all allowed to be a little lazy now and again, I just have to get out of letting it become a habit. 

Finally, I often feel I'm a boring blogger. I mean I realize that 99.99% of those reading my blog are family or friends (all 1-8 of you lovely people) so updates on family life are the usual topic. But I, like many, see so many great parenting blogs or DIY blogs or even just humorous blogs that I want mine to be up to par but instead feel like I have nothing to offer.

Well as I write these 'confessions' I recall my mom speaking of some advice from a book she's reading. The gist of it being that we need to try making small changes in order to make them into habits that will eventually be big changes in the long haul. Instead of trying to reach this grand design all at once and failing and then feeling like 'why should I try' we need to take it a step at a time. 

So I confess this. That I will continue trying to be a better blogger and I will aim to maybe enthrall a bit and perhaps entertain me and my 1-8 readers. :-)